Backlog: Today's university life includes organized orgies and paganism

A pair of items from the University of Alberta that are a few years old, but still relevant. As reported by Jamie Sarkonak in the U of A student newspaper The Gateway, October 27, 2015 (bold in original):

The rumours are true: there’s going to be an orgy for University of Alberta students..

The location and date of the “sexual mixer” is still tentative, but it will be held on November 13 at one of three tentative locations. It’s open to any student of the U of A, as long as they are willing to be screened by organizers.

Gender and sexuality ratios will be kept as close to equal as possible, to make sure nobody feels outnumbered or left out. The group is sex-positive, and said they are accepting of anyone on the gender and sexuality spectra to attend. It’s challenging to keep a balance, but keeping relatively equal numbers from all groups is important for the group’s comfort, U of A student and organizer Matthew James Hardy said.

“This way they can actually explore and not feel suppressed,” he said.

Despite the popular view that only males want to participate in group sex, there’s been equal anonymous interest from both men and women. “Slut-shaming” culture tends to make women more hesitant, but there are indeed confirmed female attendees for November’s event. There has also been interest from LGBT individuals as well, Hardy said.

“I think there’s a significant number of people out there with an interest in group sex,” Hardy said. “They just never really take the plunge.”

All levels of experience are welcome; the orgy is open to anyone who wishes to explore their fantasies in that context, he said.

The fun and thrill that comes with seeing other couples enjoying themselves in group sex can strengthen one’s own relationship, Hardy said. There’s also a greater confidence that comes after expressing oneself naked in the presence of strangers, he said. Hardy is experienced with group sex, so he will act as a moderator to make sure rules are respected.

Hardy added that orgy is not a free-for-all; no one has to interact if they don’t want to. Guidelines for etiquette, consent, and safety must be followed.

Hardy said he is willing to be the face of the group to help others express themselves without having to face any judgement. Participants themselves can stay anonymous and only need to reveal their names to Hardy himself for security purposes. Names will remain confidential and are mainly used for the screening process, which ensures participants aren’t random people who will show up and make others feel uncomfortable, Hardy said. Within the orgy, attendees can remain anonymous or disclose a fake name. Identity security will be taken very seriously, he said.

“Discretion is my number one concern,” he said. “I want to give (participants) a safe environment to express themselves in that regard and not have to worry about any peering eyes.”

Regarding STIs, there’s no way to completely know if an individual is negative since tests quickly become outdated, so Hardy is not requiring participants to get tested. They are encouraged to bring and use barrier contraceptives however. Condoms will also be supplied.

Orgy-goers can bring partners from within or outside the U of A, as long as these partners are also screened. The idea is to make sure everyone is as comfortable as possible — if bringing a friend helps, all the better, Hardy said.

The orgy will start at around 7 p.m. and end around midnight. It’s currently undecided whether alcohol will be permitted and full details will be up to the finalized in the upcoming weeks. Also undecided is the location, which will be either a Fantasyland hotel room, the local lifestyle club 4-Play, or the host’s own home. Details will be finalized closer to the date to get the most input from participants.

Hardy is open to answering questions from anyone interested. He can be contacted on Facebook or as “Duraflame” on fetlife.com in the group UAlberta Kink.

The idea in the end is to just help people express themselves in a safe environment, Hardy said.

“I don’t like the idea of having to hide what you enjoy just because someone else may find it distasteful,” he said.

Hardy’s Orgy Guidelines

1. Safe environment — Consent must be given for any interaction: participants are not to touch or initiate without first reviving explicit permission. Flirting is not always a sign they’re interested in anything beyond the verbal exchange. Coercion is not considered consent, and is thereby prohibited.

2. Etiquette — This orgy in particular will be accepting to all types and whatever part of the sexual spectrum they may consider themselves on. Nobody has to interact if they’re not interested or comfortable, but basic etiquette expects participants to decline if asked to interact. To join a particular part of the orgy, participants must ask permission. This allows things to run more smoothly. Overt aggression can result in expulsion from the orgy

3. Cleanliness — Wipe up any bodily fluids, and dispose of any contraceptives. Participants are guests, and should behave as such.

I don't know if the orgy actually took place, but given reports of what's happening at other universities, such as the University of Toronto, I wouldn't discount it. Such activities, as far as I know, haven't been made compulsory at Canadian universities--yet.

The other item, by the same writer in the same issue of The Gateway, is an interview with the U of A's Wiccan chaplain--yes, they have one:

An old Wiccan saying says, “What is remembered, lives.” The idea of life through remembrance is the backbone of both ancient and modern Halloween celebrations.

Samhain, pronounced SOW-en, is the Wiccan celebration of the last harvest of the year, and the time to consult one’s ancestors for guidance. It’s a Sabbat, a Wiccan festival aligned with the lunar and solar cycles. The Sabbat of Samhain in particular is about “putting the world to bed,” University of Alberta Wiccan Chaplain Samuel Wagar said.

Community Samhain celebrations are all different, but usually include a divination where a Wiccan acts as the Crone Goddess and gives ancestral advice to individuals seeking direction. The evening ends with traditional food and drink: pork, apples and nuts.

Wagar still remembers his first Samhain from his early 20s. He had only recently become Pagan, and attended a community celebration at the Wiccan Church of Canada in Toronto. The ceremony was a divination, where a priestess went into a trance and embodied the Pagan Goddess to give advice, which Wagar had thought of as “very cool.”

“I thought it was very moving,” Wagar said. “I liked the idea of talking to the ancestors at this time of year. It felt right to me. It also was helpful to break past the normal fear of death … The idea that the ancestors are available to consult was very heartwarming to me.”

Smaller family celebrations closely resemble a typical Thanksgiving dinner. There’s a traditional feast for the living, but also a plate and candle lit for the dead at the end of the table.

Samhain also includes the classic dressing up and going door-to-door; it’s the parent of today’s secular trick-or-treating. Hundreds of years ago, homeowners would treat disguised anonymous figures as temporarily-returned ancestors and give them gifts. Later, for a lot of European descendants, those gifts became candy.

The feeling that goes though people in Samhain celebrations is one of remembrance, Wagar said. Wiccans reflect on loved ones who have died, and even attempt to communicate with them. This time of year most appropriate, as the late fall is considered by Wiccans to be the time when the veil between the living and the dead is thinnest. Though the ancestors can always be asked for advice, they’re believed to be most communicative in this time of the year, Wagar said.

“Death is in the air,” Wagar said. “It’s a difficult time, especially for people in early agricultural societies.”

Historically, the late Fall was a time of foreboding since there wasn’t always enough harvest to make it through the winter. Winter was a time of risk and death, especially hundreds of years ago. Daily life has since changed considerably, but rituals still are used to recreate the old experiences, Wagar said.

This time of year opens up the opportunity to talk about the fact that everyone will eventually die, something most people avoid talking about on a daily basis. Death is inevitable, so people might as well accept it, Wagar said. The entire process of being alive is much more meaningful if one can understand the beginning and end of it, he added.

“It’s good to remind yourself that life is uncertain,” Wagar said “You have to be to be in good with your family, your community, your ancestors, and the natural world. And Halloween’s a good time to do that.”